For as long as I can remember, I have struggled with trypanophobia. That is a fear of needles. Now that may sound a little dramatic, however, it is accurate. I have thrown tantrums because of this fear. I have cried, thrown up, and nearly passed out because of this. One of my fondest memories is having to be physically held down by nurses and doctors to get a shot. I think that was in high school..so ya know, a little bit ridiculous.
When coming up with 30 things to do this year, I reluctantly put donating blood on the list. It's something that I have always wanted to do because it's such a small thing that really makes a difference. Plus, conquering a fear is always a good thing.
I procrastinated for months and then finally at the beginning of July, Diana and I went to lifesource to donate. This visit didn't go very smoothly. I started panicking just a little right when we walked in and I smelled that smell. You know, that medical type of smell. Then the nurse told us that we couldn't do it together, their policy is that we have to do the question part and the having needles shoved into your arm part alone. And I immediately started crying. Not sobbing, but crying enough that the nurses said I couldn't donate because I was so worked up. So Diana and I just took a few minutes, drank some juice, and I calmed down. Then I went into the little cubicle, answered some questions, and they had to poke my finger. The reading wasn't very good, so she had to poke ANOTHER finger. At this point, I'm just taking deep breaths and fighting back tears, forcing a fake smile. After all that...my iron levels were too low. Which is probably good because I was in no condition to give blood that day.
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| Is it me, or do those finger pokes REALLY hurt!? |
So I knew that if I was going to check this off the list, it had to be done now because time and bravery was running out. I feel like I was much better prepared the second time around. I took Iron supplements all week and ate a ton of red meat. And for some reason, knowing what my surroundings will look like helps me stay calm and feel somewhat in control of a situation. So this time I knew what to expect. I had one finger poked, answered all their questions, and then sat in a chair and started to take deep breaths just reminding myself "it's all good". What could be a long, dramatic story is actually pretty short. She found my super deep veins in one try on my left arm (which is the one that I had pictured) and I filled up the bag in less than 5 minutes, which she said is a record! Now I'm no doctor, but that could be because my heart was beating so fast and just pumping the blood right out of me, but who knows.
Anyway...that's done! Woohoo!
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| Victory |
And that's all I have to say about that.
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